My Favourite Mistake

1 Minute Stories... Avant Garde type feeling

a poetic twist along with one-liners

Short Tales Read Affair on Self-Love, Travel & Lifestyle

 

Every Month* New post* Same link*

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My Favourite Mistake

 

 

Let me introduce you to the 4 evil cousins to a Step kid called Acceptance

The 5 Stages of Grief – Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression & Acceptance

Always with time, finds its balance… Acceptance is Bliss. Sonner you reach it, will be Good for you!

With some Drama – you are not gonna believe this

Meaner than an OverLanding, you can’t expect the Ferraris of the world to cover the turf

 

“Sometimes it is easy to find out someone else’s secret than finding your own”

 

“My Favourite Mistake” A word that you give a meaning… well is it something you do or you did

It could be anything from having too many Americanos that are never gonna stop, maybe tripping on a recipe that was absurd like double choco peanut butter shake

OR

Going on a blind date & finding the one you are crazy about

 

Life is all good things… your know “Easy like Sunday morning”

Paid my dues, ended my debts... shit like that

When I was younger in my teens… I used to play basketball, workout, roam around miles on foot >>> repeat

back in the day, one fine morning out of the blue my dad took me to an infamous Gym & enrolled me… I can’t remember what he said, but might be something heavy

all came back in a rush, why I do what I do

What you teach your kids stay with them for a lifetime… Like stay fit & Blah blah blah

As my Bitch Ex used to say “nothing special”

 

Chole bhature look tempting, taste great but then how many times will you binge in a week… Mostly competition, Not for ShowBiz

For a healthy lifestyle - you keep getting better by paying for the gym subscription, buying gear, fixing dates to hit the floor, but never an alarm though

a sad song away from… a big belly

Leaving junk food & joining a regime until you do. hmmm for most, Always enjoyed you figuring things out

If history has taught us anything, those 2 things are not true

Does it tell when to scratch your ass

 

 

Things you Love to hear

Appearance - Patli lag rahi hooo

Connect - You rock my world

Happiness – you make me laugh & are v charming

 

That’s supposed to make me feel better

 

Lets take a 180~

 

True but you hate to hear this shit

Have you gained a few

Don’t be so lazy

You are boring

 

I’ll act like everything is sunshine & puppy dogs

 

Legend has it, that you… Deny the truth n believe a lie

After a Hot curvaceous thing walks by…

Only a Fattso will say “I am sexy, but I can’t look like that”

What is that even supposed to mean?!

Ouch that hurts

Repeat after me “Oh no Oh No Oh NoNoNo its good for me”

Healing begins when you say out loud, I stand corrected its funny

 

Loving yourself is… Looking in the mirror & not feeling good but Great about your Body

Loving yourself is not feeding yourself to death…

Loving yourself is like the bank balance you maintain, matlab ki if too much then you park those Top Dollars in high return instruments. What you kids call it Crypto, Real Estate or the Bling Bling

So it is safe to say that you keep a Healthy Bank Balance & The numbers must look good

similar to the numbers on the weighing scale

Body is a Temple, worship it! Do some burpees, crunches or shake em with suicide drills

“Sweet Pain” – as my Masseuse would call it

After a nice workout you are out like a light

 

You Ask yourself “What’s in it for me?”

R.U.N for no Reason?

Do you dance for No reason?

Do you care? better why you care?

Some do things to be synced with the trending, but the real question is

Whats your objective while we find it in simple things

 

They say “God is within” that is what it means… We search for God everywhere but within. These are those set of people who need to be happy with themselves because they seek for external solutions for internal Bliss

What I loved about Fargo is that every stupid lil thing is a detail to the big plan

Everything in life is significant & falls right in place

Ohhh Hare Ram Hare Krishna you’re good… then it became all too clear

 

For a Sick n Tired Wannabe you might have money to fix things

But then Are you in Shape or are you A Shape?

If you gonna cry, then just Join the fuckin hug club, whats this mental health crap all the time! Matlab its heights of self-pity, stop seeking so much attention all the time. If you ain’t got a shrink on speed dial then

You need Life hacking with some Miracles & change

I can write a poem for you... & we can make a story together

Anyhooo!!!

 

people who are Lean & Crazy usually find a way to have fun… for those jumping off an airplane & trying to find inner peace! Don’t forget your parachute

Mr half glass full: give me five, sounds like a Monday

What do I know, Mr. I ain’t a Doctor.

I have a 100 bad ideas & 1 good one

 

 

After the Fix-up…

McCheesy: Tring Tring

 

After checking the name

McYummy: Howdy

 

After checking the DP

McCheesy: do I know you

McYummy: Wrong Number

 

He is as ugly on the outside as you are on the inside

That’s my idea of hell

 

 

The Funny Story

 

She was MoniKa with a Fat “K”

MoniKa: I had a FAT Mirror Day, I gave myself a scare she said

Damn you needed it Yesterday

 

Mr Sarcasm: This happens when you offer a person too much attention, maybe they won’t value you as much

No easy way to say this, COW you blew my mind haha

 

MoniKa: Dear Diary, I have a theory

Miss the girl, I used to love that girl

I never cared over my life before, happy to fill the bill

They told me “no hurry, no worry, no curry, & you live a good life”

& then I met you Morons who messed up my education

 

“We see things we wanna see”

Just plain ignorance, I mean blame it on something or someone

You keep telling yourself till you believe it…

as soon as shit goes down in their life, women are waiting to post on their story status… stupid, obvious & so predictable! its like they pre-plan by gathering stuff to share after they have an episode or something

 

MoniKa said, I sacrificed my looks for Paranthas, burgers, & lot of Fries

2 Wrongs make a Right?

 

Mr Sarcasm: No, Gone spectacularly wrong

But working on yourself is a fuckin dream come true

Living the now! The Journey is Unknown, with an inspired Future

“Comeback is always stronger than the setback”

 

MoniKa: Time to come undone, I became someone I never wish to be

 

Mr.Sarcasm: You must burn this place down, burn it just about the right amount

No Prizes for guessing

 

MoniKa: Fat? Its an educated guess

In the moment of weakness made a bad decision & I quote “I ate anything that moved”

Where’s my medal

 

He toasted to women, cards & Whiskey, 3 causes of war

 

Hypocrisy is you watch porn but you criticize about it, That’s a way to put it

Later Losers

 

 

 

--- Arjun the Storyteller

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Maggi with a Silver Fork “Grand Touring”

1 Minute Stories... Avant Garde type feeling

a poetic twist along with one-liners

Short Tales Read Affair on Self-Love, Travel & Lifestyle

 

Every Month* New post* Same link*

Read > Like > Share > REPEAT

 

 

Maggi with a Silver Fork

“Grand Touring”

 

 

Bon Voyage!

Story of my life, I had gone Up North due to an exigency for inspiration… I told myself attaboy cowboy

Hell bent on a Staycation

I call shot Gun. Hmmm Sharing… Nah! Whats the point of the Ergonomic Right Wing

So you need a wing man & you get yourself ready for the ride.

In the middle of it all… you setup the Playlist - Check & go

Namaste Bitches Hangin on my bagpack we hit the Road

 

Time to Break my Genius

Bunch of Himalayan Mountains, Simply ecstatic!

Let me put it this way… Boombastic Valley scene, Matlab bole toh Fuckin A

where I come from it’s the World’s best ever commute for the wanderlust

The GT has & I Quote “more power than my toothbrush” well it takes me around the world

Some food, loads of coffee, mostly fun, it was witchcraft for us monkeys

Just like hidden gems, things we guys like, all the horses under the hood.

 

After a day of non-stopping sports mode cruzin, Everything else is just background noise

By Europe standards you cross different countries, hmmm maybe Not distance…

every 50 Kms once you move in any direction you will explore a new culture, language & different kind of people, even a brand new God for crying out loud… whats a guy like that doing in a place like this to have a time like crazy

we all show off for 2 mins & gone

Google said 12 hours & then a few later… Elvis is in Town

I’ve never seen anything like it, It’s a limited edition you see, shift the gear to “me time”

 

We set out for Off roading, there were rallies out of nowhere with people we never meet

ricochet & close escapes with things you never saw coming

doing stupid things around anyone cause you just don’t care

as free as a bird, as high as a Bourbon shot

 

its like if my grandma had wheels, she would’ve been a bike

a rare find

 

What happens in Kasol stays in Kasol

Impromptu kicks, I enter a Hostel Holy Mother! & the environment I mean taking the sights in, astonishing, nobody gives a fuck here

Like a boot camp, bunk beds

The way I see it, I don’t know what that is…

Just when I thought I was out, they pulled me right back in

 

The upside is in its former Glory

Spoken like a true believer, you sniff your drink

I got all my boys Jack, Johnnie & Jose to get the party started…

“Balle Balle”

 

No Passe tours but getting lost in the wilderness

No wifi but a surreal connect

Lights on the river flowing to psychedelic music

Trippy tree dancing with me while her friends are talking to me

Floating in air to swinging smoke

Passing out to dying bonfires & waking up in a tent

Of course after the bottomless Americanos… beer buzz early in the morning

 

if you can’t understand that then tough tomatoes

 

Marvel at the Mystery & wonder of God’s Creation

When you hear “I can hook you up”

I had to get My Tee Geronimo!

Hike to the DownTown Moon cafe, my go to place

 

Bibbity bobbity booo

Mind was in a different place

Open my eye upon a new sky

vine covered slopes & soaring mountains just like the Eastern European energy

UnReal, I did Star Gazing, walked around Labynith Maze to the Rivers flowing from every freakin corner

Away from distractions, kids making VLOGs

 

Pit stops a many, (left my wallet)

Had a maggi @ a gentleman’s called Sharmaji, nice fella with extraordinary soft-skills…

Best 5 bucks I ever spent, keep em coming

It was like hoppin & rolling in Motown

I am thinking of writing a book, You leave me no choice

 

There were Strangers who were so familiar & everyone was Selling Fairy-tales, it is extremely flirtatious

 

It is the Story about the time when people used real cameras to take pictures

When they even felt shy to smile in a picture…

It was about a time when people used to ring the bell unannounced

A time when you talked for fun

A time when you laughed for no reason

A time when you found a reason to celebrate

A time when you had friends

A time when they gave a fuck

Now nobody has time!

 

Kasol was seducing me, gone to great lengths

I think you already know, Awestruck second to None

Hallelujah

 

Lesson 2

We like to believe in things what are convenient to us, comfortable for us & make a pretentious world if you may… it is made by society, community & Political leaders unless you seek the truth you will never know

Amongst better things we settle for a Getaway through a Road trip as you kids call it Grand Tour to seek the truth of the beauty of it all

if we leave now we will be in Dubai in 2 hours

SMOOTH LEFT on the GT, look @ the view

 

Back at the convocation which is anywhere & everywhere - Badboy’s Game Plan C

Lets see what the fuss is all about

3 people can have a different view for the same thing

They had a Plan B, pet projects, talking about Monetization @ Maggi Point

Market place Startup over Maggi interesting & that’s how it all starts

You need Money in your bank acct, unless you are born with a Silver FORK

Overrated kids fantasy while everyone is stoned

 

So he tells his story

Giving smart answers to those born better than you

We are favourite declared by each other

they go out to talk, but not to each other

& hows that worked out for you

sounds like a story to learn

 

They pulled out their GT & something which was nothing less than a Tank

like a camel is happiest in the desert, camels are good in the desert, but a Tank is better.

add to list of things you know

 

Father Muthu Yangum: Collect moments & not things

Kid Rascallaa: I really need another day between Sat Sun

Father Muthu Yangum: I hope I grow up to be like you

Kid Rascallaa: she knew stuff, I let her have her way with me

Father Muthu Yangum: I’m not getting any younger

Are we still talking about the GT?

 

Kid Rascallaa: Great minds think alike? I’d use the bus if I were you…

That guy talks like him, walks like him, but ain’t him…

Settled with a Drag Race, a Race nobody was asking about

Father Muthu Yangum: Let me take you for a ride

 

You are that kid which goes into a candy shop & doesn’t know what you want but still wants everything

That someone is wrong

This is where it gets really good

Fast Forward into the story, when you screw up, screw up big time!

Apparently, they lost Millions & they came to celebrate or officially get over it!

 

Kid Rascallaa: Life is like riding a bicycle, to balance you must move forward

He was a Love Child, Tomorrows Billionaire?

1 Side of the Story

Father Muthu Yangum: Sun is not going up for me its going Down

 

Playing A Father, There is more where that came from

He had the Fomo

But then Money is no Object

he was his father’s son

Curtains!

 

Rich & killer plans, I need a spa trip now, swim to clear my head with a bottomless bloodmary to fill it up again with IDEAS to zip convertibles, you need to drive yourself to know the routes

As happy as I was, having the time of my life

Legendary tale being to life, little thing like losing the license

A so-called Forgettable Getaway

 

suddenly I realised everything is about to get worse

Upon my return Looked like hammered shit

felt loaded & could disappear while no-one noticeably cares

There is a story right there

 

On a Vacation Hangover! Wait for it…

 

 

 

--- Arjun the Storyteller

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Once Upon an Offspring Millionaire “The Drag Race”

 

1 Minute Stories... Avant Garde type feeling

a poetic twist along with one-liners

Short Tales Read Affair on Self-Love, Travel & Lifestyle

 

Every Month* New post* Same link*

Read > Like > Share > REPEAT

 

 

Once Upon an Offspring Millionaire

“The Drag Race”

 

 

Buenos Dias,

 

It is a story as old as time itself. Today’s special is, our very favourite Millions, Multi Millions & Billions!

Marco Polo is more famous than Kublai Khan… think which name people heard more

Emperor of the Mongol Empire, reigning grandson Kubali was the successor of the infamous Juggernaut nomadic tribe Leader Genghis Khan, which was the largest contiguous empire in history

So ya, he was a big deal… while Marco Polo was a Venetian Merchant & an Explorer who travelled through the Silk Route to become a Storyteller

Kubali might ask himself this quite often…

A Million reasons to go but only 1 reason to stay

Ta-Da, bring us to this

What if you were Born Clever but Poor?

 

 

Things that make you go hmmm

With money you can buy a Rolex but not Time

With money you can buy a Steak but not an Appetite

With money you can buy a Bed but not Sleep

With money you can buy a Vacay but not a Smile

With Money you can buy a Rock but not Love

 

That’s my Sales Pitch!

WORD Up

Who doesn’t like to fly Business

 

 

New kids on the block

People of Earth we mean you no Harm.

The story’s got drama, poetic shit, Struggle, struggle, struggle… itna struggle ke baad bani hai yeh

Entertainment, Cars & Money! nothing boring like a Victorian women’s novel, nothing exciting like conflict & tension

 

Mr Nice Guy – The coolest guy I know Older & Miser… Nah the Wiser Father. looks of a 22, Energy of a Teenager

Sir Fartsalot – shameless offspring, but the kids a Genius because he was an apprentice of his Guru Papa, a ready-made Effortless Millionaire, if he’s wiser will be a Billionaire

 

Sir Fartsalot watches the Alpha Dance; his old man Swinging & Slinging with the Billionaire Cowboys

Coming of age Sir Fartsalot never saw the Thug LIFE… how would he?! While the kid doesn’t like money coming in as much going out

Sir Fartsalot enters the field, Fashionably Late

Mr Nice Guy said “All men want to be you, all women want to be with you…”

 

Lesson 101 - What will I get?

Mr Nice Guy: Ding Dong

Sir Fartsalot: whose there?

Mr Nice Guy: $Money

Sir Fartsalot: Money who?

Mr Nice Guy: Exactly! you getting alot

I got breaking news “you’re a Multi-Millionaire”

 

 

Fun Fuckin Fact

Mr Nice Guy speaking to the Unicorn Club “Untold Dollars… we find fault in our children but still love em”

Big Daddy Miser’s Millionaire Kid goes out to buy a bag worth 5 Lacs, ya I mean the LV crap

Sir Fatrsalot: Pops look what I got

 

The father looks at the price tag & then the Economics Lesson was in session,

Mr Nice Guy said “I had a poor father, unlike your Rich Pa”

Maybe I will never understand the average Billionaire’s Double Scoop

We have laws - If you eat 3 slices together it counts as 1 not half pizza… shit like that!

Like in an auction you don’t guess the tag! You buy the Shit!

But on a rainy day in our life… When it rains it fuckin pours, save a few Millions for then will ya?

The Struggle v Stressful the struggle itna struggle ke baad…

He looks at his watch, time to go its Bourbon o’clock

You know Like alcohol fixes everything, lets do this

 

 

Time Travel

 

They order a couple of old fashioned at the Club bar

Mr Nice Guy: My mistakes will be knowledge I transfer

Sir Fartsalot: But what if I want to make my own?

Mr Nice Guy: You would know more if you walked in my shoes…

Sir Fartsalot: Judgement comes when you make your own

Mr Nice Guy: That’s an expensive one which I can tell for Free

 

Another Round, while they sip away

Mr Nice Guy: I wish I live longer

Sir Fartsalot: I wish I had more money

Mr Nice Guy: Money is no object for the right price

Sir Fartsalot: Mmhmmm

 

time & space is consumed, this ones on the house

Mr Nice Guy: Time is always precious

Sir Fartsalot: How much do we have?

Mr Nice Guy: no matter what age or when, you never makeup for lost time

Sir Fartsalot: What do I do?

Mr Nice Guy: You learn from the past & hang on to the moments

Sir Fartsalot: how?

Mr Nice Guy: Live the Now & invest in tomorrow

Smiling ear to ear, makes me feel young

 

 

like my Basketball coach used to say…

Its like a boxing match between a real boxer & a guy who thinks he is coz he wears satin shorts

 

All religion is a foolish answer to a foolish question, so we do sports

Picture a Grand Prix Racetrack

Thinking of that beautiful HotWheels… drum roll

 

Mr Nice Guy: called upon my old friends, speed & power

Mental age of 5, which I am & every other Guy

The old man rolls in a big ass pickup truck, he was a Petrol Head, make some noise, he was a Converse Canvas Guy, steps out with those Brand-spanking New sneakers

Shouted Your Majesty…

The Business of Speed is Staggering, apparently better

Quicker even by todays standards

I can bet my Chaddis on it

 

Sir Fartsalot: Drifting his way in… It was all American & brilliantly evil, like a German Dentist riding a Fatboy & thinks he is part of the Hells Angels cult while buys a coke at the Oktoberfest

He rolled in an Electric Blue Mustang with white Racing Stripes, bought his Hot Wheels with Pocket money

Looking good is more important than looking at… where you goin

 

Mr Nice Guy: Asked nicely for the important drag race to see who will lose after which we will get some lunch. In 5 minutes this came along… Mild Terror!

Super Car - An old 350 Brake horse power Blast from the Past

The Hot Rod rolls in… Lost a few ponies but Paid Top Dollars for it, gotta love it for that… Daddys not messing here

Strange thing is, the only speed it understands is a Bit of road, bit… when it gets all the food it needs could kill.

 

Sir Fartsalot: Your Highness could? Will!

As he would say it… A penny short, a gram dry &… Drag Race type Fashion

 

Mr Nice Guy: Lets see what that thing can do?

Put the money where the mouth is

 

The Super Car does some wonders

Mr Nice Guy: On that terrible disappointment

who is your daddy… in all literal sense…

Sir Fartsalot: you!

 

Celebration Mode activated. That pretty Hot thing… all doors & no trousers

Its about Family, “MONEY” & Sacrifice

“if I put a buck for each time, I thought of you I would’ve been a Millionaire”

What you save & invest, makes you a Billionaire, well that’s what you earn

It doesn’t just happen to you, Excuse the Pun

 

 

Bhasin’s Jam

Billy Idol uncle yeh kya hai

With a rebel yell she cried more, more, more …

 

If it didn’t make you think then it wasn’t worth it

 

 

BBye

 

--- Arjun the Storyteller

Feel Free to Leave a Comment or not, whatever you lovelies wish

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UnHinged Pick up Line “Gentlemen’s Rose”

1 Minute Stories... Avant Garde type feeling

a poetic twist along with one-liners

Short Tales Read Affair on Self-Love, Travel & Lifestyle

 

Every Month* New post* Same link*

Read > Like > Share > REPEAT

 

 

UnHinged Pick up Line

“Gentlemen’s Rose”

VOL – III

 

 

NamasteJi

 

Queen Bee fans to Tinderalla friendlies

“Always #Loveyourself or people will stop loving you”

If anyone makes you feel guilty about loving yourself, then they’re bad news!!!

 

From my last… Hope you are having a Gastronomic experience

Nothing less than Lip smacking Deliciously Yum,

While you enter the world of romantic relationships you have a thought

 

“Escaping is easy, hardest part is staying Free”

Absofuckinlutely

 

By invite only:

Hush hush UnHinge, the app shows a new most Compatible person almost always popping up when you fire up the thing, enjoy the algorithm throwing all sorts of guys at ya, while the guy may send a Rose to the chosen one or many, maybe an embarrassing display of roses

I am a Storyteller Not a Fortune Teller

 

This is Legend

Boy: I also want flowers

Girl: Awww

Boy: lets talk equality

 

“Defeat is not when you fall, it is declared when you refuse to get up”

With that thought he moves to battle the real RomCom life

 

Have a sense of humor, like Graduate from Friends & take a few Seinfeld sss

Single’s Club - Direct adult pickup lines, Cheesy pickups, indirect pickups is a thing. What you want, what you really really want?

 

Those dope Pick up lines or how some call it Cheesy…

·        Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? – It’s a compliment enjoy it duuu

·        Hey Hottie, Hiya Good looking – I like it

·        I won’t bite unless you like it – play it safe Dawg

 

 

New kids on the block

 

So we come to the Star Cast: you two will hit it off

Miss Compromise - Strong opinions loosely held, Hopeless Romantic

Mr Apologize - Big Fan of 2^nd Chances, playful lil Dipshit

 

EPIC Mr Apologize

“I’m sure you’re tired coz you been running in my mind since”

What if you get a text like that…?

 

Mr Apologize: Knock knock

Miss Compromise: Who’s there?

Mr Apologize: The Man of your Dreams

Miss Compromise: You Wish

Mr Apologize: Haina Tumhare dil me

Miss Compromise: Flirt

Mr Apologize: I am only asking if the answer is yes. When do I pick you up?

 

How to ask for her number:

If I wasted 20 mins of your life then I will make it up to you, so are we swiping digits or what

 

Smoother than my Cold brew

Mr Apologize: Gorgeous, Lovely, Stunning - Tum sab ho, Bas meri nahi

Miss Compromise: You gotta ask yourself 1 thing, Do you feel lucky Punk

Mr Apologize: I feel… you are my hot coffee & if loving coffee is wrong then I don’t wanna be right

 

Matlab intelligent conversation kyo… is it an interview for the VP position

I’m a moron! Lo karlo dating… that’s why nobody likes me, maybe because I am so terribly honest…

 

Original BadAss

Mr Apologize: “100 times more beautiful than 100 Roses”

Miss Compromise: Don’t Talk shop… take it slow

Mr Apologize: My demands are slight & my sacrifice is real

Miss Compromise: Go ahead make my day

Mr Apologize: I loved you before I saw you

 

Princess speaks

Miss Compromise: “If looking good is a crime then I don’t wanna me right”

Mr Apologize: Confidence is sexy, I wouldn’t have it any other way, beauty, brain & character

Miss Compromise: Good News travels fast

Mr Apologize: Mere pass Mohobat hi hai dene ko

 

 

Fun Fuckin Fact

 

Sarcasm - “Everyone wants to be Loved” but you must give back…

after a while, why is it so exhausting?!

 

so you find extremes of both worlds, from those who want everything to revolve around them & others who say they don’t care but the irony is that they fuckin care about everything while they try to just act cool

 

Romantic Witchcraft for real, nobody can decode this shit

·        they want a relationship, but they don’t want to make effort

·        they are not sure what they want yet, but they are never gonna make-up their melons

·        they want friendship, but they are equally confused

·        they don’t want it, but feel jealous when others have it

·        they like the idea of it when they see others enjoying it, while they say “don’t give a fuck about it”

·        they crib all the time to want to have it, but when it is right infront of them, then they either run away or just can’t accept it

 

Do you want me to wipe your ass for ya too

 

 

Things that make you go hmmm

 

 

In society’s social fabric

Conversations go either way from Sex to Karma

People like to talk about death & taxes

Other People talk about shoes & fashion

Touchy topics of Religion & Politics

Some run for fun others Paint

But when love comes they run away

Sloppy move

Be honest - I wanna have sex

Trust – better be good in bed

Loyal – doggy style, go figure

 

Easy to understand just like Moore’s law, how the dating scene took off

While you can’t be alone… Cohabitating environment be like:

Whats privacy between us now when you use my pot, so due to this very reason I can check your phone… Do you want a Game change now!

 

Dating is as confusing as the weather nowadays, while it is like when you “quarantine yourself”

Its peaceful yet tiring,

you feel Free yet occupied

Quite complicated shit

 

External solutions to internal Pain, as the wise say “Pain is its own teacher”

 

 

like my Basketball coach used to say…

 

Overconfidence to Hypocrisy be like -

These apps will help you as much as the ones which help you with diet plans… only if you diligently follow them through PERIOD.

You talk about body shaming ain’t nice, but when you can’t decide to wear clothes for an hour because you yourself say “I look Fat”

“Intermittent Fasting!” whats all that about

 

When a FatLady yells “I’m Hot”! Ques: Am I supposed to be impressed

A friend said “that woman gets paid to look the way she does”

So you’re telling me that you need money just to look good?

 

 

Time Travel

 

Lets travel the Unexplored well for a few or most or atleast in my Story by

Mr Apologize: “everything I saw before you, was a waste of life”

 

Dramatic Before After

She said ”I want a divorce”

Judge: why, does he not treat you right?

She: ya he doesn’t give me orgasms

Judge: that’s not a good reason for Divorce

She: you got a better reason to stay married?

 

I can write a Book on Marriage & Religion but for now we’re gonna stick to Dating

Since forever everyone is Weirdly attracted to Looney confidence or the opposite sex being stupidly charming

It is attractive to be who you are… unapologetic for the things you do coz you do em

 

 

Bhasin’s Jam

 

We can fool around
But I don't think it's working out

I brought you some orange juice
'Cause I wanna break up with you

 

Better luck Next time

 

 

--- Arjun the Storyteller

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Tinderalla Perfect 10 or “Mera Wala PIZZA” VOL – II

1 Minute Stories... Avant Garde type feeling

a poetic twist along with one-liners

Short Tales Read Affair on Self-Love, Travel & Lifestyle

 

Every Month* New post* Same link*

Read > Like > Share > REPEAT

 

 

Tinderalla Perfect 10 

or

“Mera Wala PIZZA”

VOL – II

 

 

Ciao

 

Let’s bring you up to speed on the dating scene today

if your last relationship lasted longer than a cold or maybe for a few hours then you may wanna read this, for everyone else - try it like your first time

if you missed your youth then it’s time to have some fun

Purani Jawani yaad aajaigi BC (Before Covid)

 

New kids on the block

 

Rumour has it You look for polished but fall for Looney

You call yourself Sapiosexual but a sucker for Banter

If you are a loner, it starts with your friend telling you to hook up on the app

If you are heart broke, had a bad experience, love gone wrong or on a rebound, you are suggested to make your profile & get out there

If you are waiting for the one, then well do something about it or else Aunty Ji will show that chocolate boy neighbour or the pyari ladki everyone was talking about at the last wedding that she attended

Faux pas – You have a “MATCH”

1 constant in the ever-changing universe

 

let me tell you what’s HOT besides my Coffee

Influx of population to the “Tinderalla Women’s world” has grown & how…

Of course, men followed, you know the insta “follow button” was invented for Men.

On the app (not insta duuu), most of the profiles will say “I ain’t active here”

you: hmmm, no prob lets go to another & another, but you find similar stuff

next one said “you can catch me on my insta handle

Crazy part is that they are finding followers to promote whatever, doing everything but finding a fuckin date…

Aur mein apni Pan ki Dukan ko advertise karunga… lets get one thing straight I can also do that, classy nahi hai… phir rules kyo hai bhai

 

the next one said “only looking for Friends” I was like “Then go to Netflix” WTF are you doing here, haha

Lo bhai, yaha toh agenda hi kuch aur hai… its true

Last I checked this place was for dating, otherwise all are on the app for 1 thing… eventually of course all leads to that. Ya for some maybe years

itni mehnat kari, eyes aur fingers are hurting now… “Na ho paiga”

 

While bumble bee challenges aerodynamics

Tinderalla you better be sassy & the match better look sharp

I hate to break your heart but there is nothing like a Man’s World, it never existed since Kings had like a Million wives, that too was made up by an intelligent Woman

I think, Beautiful = Woman. A Perfect 10

& because of this very reason, Men can’t be a 10, so get in line

like the real world, Tinderalla is definitely a Women’s world & I am Un-bias of this opinion; then why should the Guy always make the 1^st move?! There is no rule in this universe however the dating ecosystem has defined rules otherwise… food for thought

 

This phenomenon Mushroomed over the past few…

speaking of which I come to its party piece…

 

 

Fun Fuckin Fact

 

While on the hunt for the future partner, some want a Perfect 10 in your element

A wonderful analogy - While others settle for a Mera Wala Pizza – thin crust, extra cheese, if you feel wild then tikka masala toppings… or mushroom + olives else the classic Margarita

Good Food makes up for the shortcomings

 

Shaunk se bara kuch nahi

Aur Swaad toh simple mein bhi hai boss

 

You know how it is when you wanna freakin craft a person out, wo hi hai Mera Wala PIZZA, it comes under make your own Pizza section

But then life’s a bitch, you usually don’t get what you want & damn tough to want what you have…

 

EVERYONE LIKES PIZZA

The Harmony between tomatoes & cheese, balanced taste

Dating is like pizza, its cheesy & you want it your way, your style, your flavours, you keep finding that pizza joint which makes it as per you

 

Let me Paint picture for you & the fact of the matter is…

Dominos don’t serve a good pizza but known for quick delivery

While considering the taste of the Pizza, Fat Lulus comes to your mind

hands down Dominos is no competition when it comes to taste!

So it all comes down to simple things

Do you want “fast food Dominos” or “fine dining Fat Lulus”

Make up your melons

 

If you’re wanting to get married, hmmm I think you’re crazy but then everyone wants to have the Pizza they love the most… you try it, you like it, you buy it on repeat

but then who likes Pizza everyday! That’s when it hits you

For those imaging themselves in a wedding dress… gulp

If you enter a Pizza place you won’t get a Thali meal

 

Mushrooms are to Pizza what looks are to attraction or medium roast arabica is to coffee

 

trying to survive with a smile…

Silly to ask Obvious questions - are you flirting with me? Like seriously! duuu

Doesn’t take an expert to guess

 

Dating app talkies (Alias names)

 

2 Women be like –

JeLo: can you believe this… some guy called me beautiful

Poo: what a Creep!

JeLo: giving him radio silence.

Poo: does he have Wit

JeLo: I am a Sapiosexual, who does he think he is…

Poo: is he married?

JeLo: he didn’t update the status on his Bio

Poo: un-match him

 

2 Men be like –

Jobs: I got a match

Musk: WTF, is she Hot

Jobs: she is gorgeous

Musk: ask her out

Jobs: she said I must be a Dog person… is that a thing

Musk: you’re practically one yourself

Jobs: she broke up with me

Musk: world record for the shortest relationship

 

 

Things that make you go hmmm

 

Expectations

·        if Audacious – find a Billionaire

·        simple – find a date

 

Perception

·        drop dead gorgeous, charming & even intelligent. Wah!

·        Give all your attention to me… haha

 

Reality

·        Has a Paunch

·        Super Boring

 

Aiyo Aiyo Aiyo!!!

Don’t let your college degree give you a headache

 

 

like my Basketball coach used to say…

 

“No rules if you wanna play the game of hearts”

 

Getting started to make your Bio… that’s what you kids call it nowadays

Simple shit but you Elon Musk into the exercise… What makes you happy?

So Coffee, Fast Cars, Getaways, Music & Sports are a given for me

most common for everyone is comfort Food… hmmm Lazy too, rather put up some skills if you got any – like dancing

How can I forget the animal lovers… Moron its not Non-veg, it means those with Pet pix… rather aajkal Vegan is Swag

 

This is the incredibly Hilarious part, these profiles are like a Trailer of a Horror movie… describing the Version of themselves in such a manner which won’t get them a date… maybe they had bad experiences but how can one paste it on their Bio!!! I don’t even know what that means.

Then those who have such high standards that they’ll never find anyone. I read them like this – “Gift to Mankind” or you can say they are a Demi-God, perhaps that makes the other a Devil, interesting

Matlab writing about what they hate in the opposite sex… How to Talk & walk

I think they need a Dog, while most always say “you need to get along with my Dog” & post a click with their pooch, acha that’s how the style got so famous hmmm

 

Unless you’re famous or a Bitcoin nobody cares… that being said, to my next

 

 

Time Travel

 

Like Bitcoin, it is what you believe!

But you gamble & if you have an appetite for how much…

you don’t know what, how or when things work out & change for yourLovelySelf

 

If you can argue on colours – this is not Pink or that one is Red not Orange etc

Then its simple

either you don’t have a life (Present)

Or

you are divorced (Past)

Or

don’t get married! (Future)

 

when your relationship has gone from dapper to boxers then you need to worry because the other is fishing, That’s an over share

 

 

Back to the Playlist

 

Kaise kia John Legend uncle?

all of me, loves all of you

even when I lose, I’m winning

ohhh aise, Theek hai Theek hai

 

We’re talking Pizza, so we must look at Cheesy Liners…

“Coffee break”, I do better post Re-fills

 

 

See ya in a Few

Grazie

 

 

--- Arjun the Storyteller

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